My 8 Summer Don'ts

1. Don't forget sunscreen for your pale skinned, bald little baby. Don't forget water for yourself or the baby. It'll make the rest of this stuff a lot more fun.



2. Don't spend to many nap times inside cleaning. Do go enjoy a book and glass of lemonade in the sun.



3.  Don't spend time fretting over your not-so-perfect swimsuit body. Do feel proud of your body's ability to grow, birth and raise you precious baby girl.



 4. Don't worry that you've eaten one too many hot dogs or cheeseburgers. Do soak in the laughter of friends and smiles of growing babies as you enjoy a summer cookout.

5. Don't worry too much about a schedule. Do spontaneously go to the beach, ice cream shoppe or friends' houses.



6. Don't miss out on the chance for new friends. Do smile, say hello and strike up a conversation at the beach, park or in passing on the sidewalk.

7. Don't let the summer pass without an apple fritter from Back Door Donuts and a sunset at Menemsha Beach.



8. Don't forget to pause and reflect on the mind-blowing, amazing way your life has changed 100% for the better this past year. Do hug your baby every chance you get. Do kiss your husband as often as possible. Do call your family and friends. Do take time to love yourself.



Linking up with Mama Kat today! I chose the prompt: Your Top Ten Summer Don'ts... except I just did 8 :)

What I know for sure.

What I know for sure is that being a mom is the hardest thing I've ever done. I know for sure that I haven't gotten a full night's sleep in over nine months and I am tired. I know for sure that my life has been irrevocably changed.

And this change? Is for the good.

I know for sure that I am able to love bigger. I am able to hug tighter. I am able to smile wider. I know for sure that life couldn't get much better.

And once you see the little face behind these crazy beautiful life changes, you'll see why.













I know for sure that every time I think I couldn't possibly love this little baby any more, she goes and does something cute like this that makes my heart explode.

Linking up with Mama Kat!

A Memorable Date

It was a Wednesday night. June 23rd. We felt like getting out, heading into town. So we drive around for a while trying to decide on where to eat. Chris checked the to see how long we'd have to wait for a table at several restaurants, while I stood, holding my belly and my hopes for a birth. We made our way (slowly) to one of our favorite restaurants and got a table on the patio right away.



I don't remember what I ordered, or even exactly what we talked about. I do remember looking at two girls about my age who were dressed adorably and fashionably and were sharing a glass of wine. Oh how I missed wine. I remember feeling heavy and swollen and about to burst, but also radiant and beautiful and so incredibly grateful for that large tummy. I remember sitting across from my husband and best friend knowing this would be our last fancy date night without a little babe waiting for us back home.

After dinner we wandered over to a little park where Chris laid down, head on my lap and I struggled to get comfortable.



Eventually dessert came up, as it always does with a pregnant woman. Chris (finally!) agreed to brave the North End for me so I could get the cannoli I had so been dreaming of. He dropped me at the curb, I "ran" it and got two chocolate chip cannolis.



We drove aimlessly, eventually deciding on our favorite view of Boston. We found a bench. While we sat we ate our delectables, watched an assortment of people, watching me, pass by and enjoyed a peaceful sunset.





It is a date I will always remember. We were so filled with excitement and anticipation. We were loving being a couple of two, but looking forward to being joined by our baby bird. And 5 days later we were.





Linking up with Writer's Workshop over at Mama Kat's.

Friends

This is, at least, how I remember it.

I joined Facebook in the spring of my freshman year of college. Back then it was limited to just a handful of colleges. I remember checking, occasionally, the list of schools added, checking, occasionally, for my friends from childhood. One, in particular. It was a while until we became Facebook friends, but I was so glad to make the connection. It had been many years since we were last in contact and regret followed me throughout.

She became my best friend in 2nd grade. I remember vividly, peeking out the kitchen window of my new house, to the driveway down below and seeing her standing there. My new best friend. We had sleepovers, played house, rode the bus together, wore the (optional) school uniform.  We would walk home from the bus stop and talk for what felt like hours. We saw Titantic together, more than once. Best of friends. 

And then, 8th grade happened.  Middle school- I'm not sure there was a worse time of my life. Hormones were coursing through my moody body and I was growing tired of being unpopular. I'm not sure how conscious it was, but I started separating myself from my best friend and from others. Less friendly, less interested. Until suddenly, we weren't friends anymore. And then she went to a private school and moved away. I had severed one of the best relationships in my life and now, it seemed, reconciliation would be impossible.

Reconnecting on Facebook has been good and bad, for me. Good because I see she's happy. She has a beautiful husband and son.  Bad because we've grown up into two people I think would be very good friends. We both have babies. We both value our walks with God. We both treasure our families. We had something special and I botched it. Sure, there were extenuating circumstances that perpetuated the weakening of our friendship, but I'm the one that set it in motion. I'm glad to be reconnected with her, but in a way, it's a painful reminder of the poor decision my 12 year old self made.

 I'm linking up with Mama Kat today, writing in response to this prompt:

Social media is an amazing way to reunite with old friends. Describe a good or not-so-good experience you’ve had with it.

Head on over to read some other people's stories :)

 

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Relief

For 9 months I grew a baby. For 9 months I dreamed of her face. For 9 months I prepared for birth. For 9 months I hoped for a safe, speedy, med-free delivery. And then, in the wee hours of a Monday morning in late June, my water broke. A mere 5 hours later my baby was birthed into this world, healthy and perfect and beautiful. Everything went as well as I hoped. Better even, than I had let myself dream.

But then, we got to our post-partum recovery room and um, wait? I have a baby? I am responsible for this baby? I have no idea what to do.

My hormones were raging. I was exhausted from labor. I was so incredibly in love with my baby and so incredibly overwhelmed by what to do next. How often should I feed her? Is it supposed to hurt when she nurses? Everyone says it shouldn't, but um, she's sucking on my boob a lot. We need some sleep. I can't sleep. Baby is screaming while Daddy tries to swaddle her. It's our bedtime, but she's not interested in that right now.

I remember sitting in the hospital bed through the night, unable to sleep, holding this perfect little miracle in my arms. I would watch and watch and watch out the window to see the sun rise. When the sun would start to peek out, then I would know it was going to be ok.

I knew what else would make it ok. My mom. Baby came two days early. My mom wouldn't be there until Tuesday night. I remember thinking throughout Monday and Tuesday, it'll be ok when she gets here. Hold it together until she gets here.

Never in my life have I felt such relief to see my mom, dad and brother walk through the hospital room door. Tears poured down my face. A weight was lifted off my heart. Help had arrived. My mom would teach me, show me, comfort me. She would reassure me that I could do this. She would hold my crying baby. She would help me not to worry.

And she did. For two full weeks she reassured, she comforted, she cleaned, she made meals, she took the baby between night feedings so I could sleep. She made me feel like a good mom. She made me feel like I could do it.

*Part of Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop. Check it out!

Smiles

It's Writer's Workshop time again! I chose to write about a time someone made me smile. Pardon my poetry skills, please :)

an early spring night,
grilling seemed right.

as i headed out to make more than a snack
my husband, from work, just got back.

not finding me home,
he went back out to roam.

me done cooking our dinner
as he returned a winner.

in his hands were two flowers
one for me and one for the daughter, unborn, that was ours.

Big Bad Big Sister

It's Writer's Workshop at Mama Kat's. Today I'll be writing about a time I stood up for a friend. In my case, a sister.

my little sister

Once upon a time I stood up for my little sister. It was the summer before 7th grade. My sister would be in 5th grade. My best friend (the same one who so graciously played house with me) was hosting a kickball game up the street. There was a new girl in the neighborhood, so we headed to the game to meet her and have so fun. As we arrived, teams were being picked. The new girl was sizing up her potential team and potential opponents.

Almost the second she spotted my sister, I heard the new girl mumble, "I don't want to be on that girl's team." I was pissed. First of all, how dare she say something mean about this little girl she just met. Second of all, and more importantly, this new girl had no idea that my sister would have been the exact person you'd want on your team. She's a natural athletic talent.

I remember walking right up to the new girl saying, "You have no idea what you are talking about." I told Lydia were going and away we stormed down the street back home. I felt so validated walking away from that kickball game, I felt tough, like I had really kicked the new girl's butt. She would regret messing with me, alright. Looking back, I seriously doubt she did.

This introduction was the beginning of a very tumultuous friendship. We would be enemies one day. Friends the next. We wouldn't talk for days. Then we would be inseparable. I would say I hated her not knowing she would one day grow up to in my wedding and be one of the most loyal friends of my life. In middle school I had to defend my sister from her. Now? She is so much a part of my life she is like my sister.

enemy turned friend :)

Playing House

It's Writer's Workshop day over at Mama Kat's and I've finally joined in again, after over a years' hiatus. So, If you had made a career out of whatever you were passionate about when you were ten…what would you be doing?


My passions as a little girl involved two things, primarily. Playing house and playing school. I occassionally went fishing with my brother and sister, or played kickball in the backyard. We watched TV like Saved by the Bell, Full House and all those oldie but goodies. But my passions? The things that I loved? Playing house and school. I loved having my brother and sister be my students or children I was taking care of. We would set up in the basement, or outside under our back porch. My poor, neighborhood best friend was subjected to this game one too many times.

The funny thing? I haven't outgrown this passion. I have spent my time as an adult being a teacher and being a wife & mother. I loved being a teacher for three years. The kids made me laugh and pushed me to do better.I genuinely enjoyed watching a 5 year old suddenly "get it" and be able to read. I swelled with pride as a student wrote out a sentence that I could actually "read." Teaching is a passion.

And now? I have the role of a lifetime as mommy to Meredith. Getting to stay home with my sweet baby girl, watch her daily developments, create around her a safe and happy environment is a dream come true.

So I suppose I've always known what I was made to do. I'm just so glad I am actually getting to do it.

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Writer's Workshop: Summer

It's Writer's Workshop time again over at Mama Kat's blog.

I chose the prompt:
2.) Find your one very favorite picture of Summer and write a poem about it.
(inspired by me)

While I can't say its necessarily my very favorite ever, this picture is one I really like and I'm writing a haiki about it.

Sitting on the sand
A sunset to toast the day
Fall, one day closer

My Fall Favorites

Over at Mama Kat's blog its Writer's Workshop day. I get to write about my fall favorites, which I would love to do even if it weren't one of the prompts.

My absolute fall favorite is the cool, crisp air that fills New England, pushing out all the summer humidity and heat. I love the changing colors of leaves. I love pulling out old sweaters and my trusty Birkenstock clogs, setting aside sandals for awhile. I love rediscovering clothes I forgot I had during the warm months.
I love, love, love apple picking and the cider donuts that meet me at the end. I love baking apple pie, apple crisp and apple dumplings when I get home.


I love going to Parker's Maple Barn, enjoying the scenic drive and stuffing my face with scrumptious breakfast treats like pumpkin pancakes.



I love carving pumpkins and I love decorating my house with fall themed items. I love filling my home with the smell of pumpkin rolls baking. I think I am going to love cooking and devouring these for the first time.

Fall is my favorite season. Even though it is the end of summer, it seems so filled with hope and the promise of many happy times in the holiday season.

Writing Workshop

Over at Mama Kat's blog its Writer's Workshop day and I've finally chosen to participate.

The Prompts:

1.) Your trip to the ER...spill it.
(inspired by Stephanie from This Blessed Life).

2.) "Why are American's obsessed with weight? Why are we always fighting or complaining about what is natural for our bodies?"
(inspired by Jenn from Jenny Says What?)

3.) Describe one of your 'God Moments'.
(inspired by Jordan from Wide Open Spaces).

4.) List ten things you would say to ten different people in your life...if you had the hutzpah.
(inspired by Cassandra from Cassagram)

5.) Why is your kid in time out?
(inspired by Sera from Laughing Through The Chaos)

I'm choosing #4. And to quote the originator of this idea, "Don't assume to know who is who. You might be surprised."

1. You need boundaries in your life. Learn to say no. You'll be amazed at how the world continues to go 'round when you do.

2. I miss you very, very much but cherish all the times we have together. And while I hope one day we can be what we once were I don't really believe its possible. Even still, I cherish our memories.

3. I hate your rotten guts. Fortunately I no longer waste time thinking about that. You aren't worth it.

4. Do you like me? Because I really like you and consider you to be a very good friend. Not sure you feel the same way.

5. You're a catch. I believe that. I want you to as well.

6. I'm sorry I was mean. I wish I could take it back, but that was a long, long time ago.

7. You are one of my very favorite people in the universe.

8. It's ok if you aren't always right or "in the know." I will still love you just as much. Maybe even more.

9. Thank you for taking the time to love me, listen to me and make me feel like I matter. Years later I still appreciate it deeply.

10. I hope we are friends forever and that our children will be friends forever.