Mandy got me thinking about middle school and high school and how rough those years can be. But then I was reading Dooce today and she hit stated perfectly what I had been wanting to say: "I want to tell the ten-year-old me that [family] really is as amazing as I hope it will be. In fact, you have no idea."
I have an amazing family and felt truly loved growing up. No terrible tragedies or great heartbreak occured. But those early teen years are just awkward. I was often riddled with insecurity, feeling ugly, not stylish and uncool. I was painfully shy. I had some great friends, but remember how important it felt to be popular?
I wish I could go back to my 7th, or 8th, or 9th grade self and give her a big squeeze. I wish I could tell her that one day you will still have insecure moments, you will still have sad days, you will occasionally be shy, but mostly? Mostly, you will be very happy.
You will have a husband who loves you and thinks you are beautiful. You will have a baby that makes your days brighter than you imagined possible. You will be close to your family members (even though they move away, and that sucks, but it's ok). You will have a few good friends (not a lot, but you don't need a lot, you never have).
I wish I could tell her that those popular kids that matter so much then, don't matter at all now. They have absolutely no bearing whatsoever on your happiness as an adult. You have a life that makes you full.
I wish I could tell her that those pimples you worry so much about? No one really notices them. One day you won't walk around feeling like you have a lighthouse beacon shining out of your forehead. You'll put on concealer and move along with your day. Also, you'll become more proud of those hips. You'll learn how to better dress them. You'll learn their power as they carry a baby and help escort her into the world.
I wish I could tell her that life is so wonderful. That all that insecurity, worry, anxiety and awkwardness is unnecessary and pointless. But I guess all that really matters is that I know now.